I have to say I am giddy to be here. Truly. I have missed you. To say the last few months have been a journey of self discovery would be a nice way to sum it all up. I know my military family will know exactly what I am talking about. When you move your family so often you have a chance to rediscover yourself. Maybe the word chance sounds like you have a choice, maybe instead I should say you are forced to rediscover yourself. Most moves involve relocating to a place where you live in temporary housing, have a million boxes delivered that they tell you are yours…but at this point you are not so sure you want them to be, and you know no one! There is no Mom down the street to come over and help with the kids, or friend to call over when you need a break. It is a time when you are forced to be alone and learn all about what you are made of.
Knowing this I always plan a period to reflect on my work, my design and allow for time to change them. I knew this time it would be a dramatic change as I could barely stand to look at my website! But I had no idea what it would turn into. A serious work of the heart. I wanted to build it from scratch. In doing so I could make it my own. When I sat down to design it I was shocked by how much harder it was that I thought it would be. A blank slate. All I knew was that I wanted it to be like a lift the flap book with hidden nooks and crannies for a client who enjoyed such things but have the information easy enough for those who didnt want to have to look. I wanted it to feel soft and organic and more like how I feel. I also wanted it to be a little messy and free and not feel like it was a standard website. So with that I got started. I worked on it a few hours a day for months. Ffty hours last week and just this weekend alone I spent over 30 hours. It is literally a labor of love. Perfect for its launch date of Valentines Day.
I owe so much to my family. My husband has picked up the slack numerous times and played both Mommy and Daddy this weekend. My boys as always have been so understanding and loving, I am so looking forward to spending some Mommy time with them and I am so thankful for my friends and family. Meredith for her right sided brain, Shelley, my cousin, for spending hours and hours bouncing ideas with me, Erin for her left sided brain, and my Dad for his proofing brain. Thank each of you for helping me when Matt seriously could not hear “will you look at this” one more time! You all were my raft when I needed it most. Yes, as in SOS!
And lastly, I have a dedication. Long pause as I still my quivering lip. Man, I am not sure I can even type this. Deep breath. When I left Germany we learned the news that my Aunt was sick. Very sick. I had a photography workshop to go to in Orlando so it just so happend that I was already on my way home. Because of this workshopI was home during the most moving 2 weeks of my life. My Aunt, her name is Sheila, is one of my most favorite people. The news that she could be leaving this world was unthinkable. Something I literally could not comprehend. But because I was home for my conference, I got to spend a little extra time with her. Here is a little story from one of my last visits with her.
I was driving over to her house, about a half an hour from my Moms. Sheila lived on a beautiful big lake with moss lined trees. It was my refuge. When I would think about going home to Florida, I would always think of spending time with Sheila by the lake. Always. So on my drive over I got nostalgic and even a little happy. I was so thankful and at that moment it didn’t matter how many more I had, just that I had this one. I could have never imagined what my visit would be like. Sheila had suffered a few strokes just a week or two before. With the strokes she lost her ability to talk freely. Words would get lost or replaced with other words and she would get frustrated in her gentle way or even laugh when they came out wrong. When I first arrived she was curled up in her bed. She looked like a little girl in her big wide bed. A few moments later she slowly walked out to visit. At one point we sat on the couch and we talked. She then said that she wanted to show me her favorite. She went on to say her favorite, prize. Shaking her head no, she said prize again. She then grabbed my hand and lead me slowly to the kitchen and said my favorite…took me to the fridge and pointed to a picture. The prize was a picture I had taken. A picture of her granddaughter and my Jonathen talking on a hill side, unaware of my presence. She looked me in the eye and said. my favorite, and I said, picture.
A picture was replaced with prize. I am pretty sure that could not be more profound.
I will never look at a picture the same. I vow to bring it to my work. To value each picture as a prize. Your prize. And for that I dedicate the place that holds my prizes, my website, to my Aunt Sheila.
And now it is time. Time for a fresh new start. Nothing says fresh and new like a brand new baby. Meet Brady, just a few days old with his beautiful Mom. I can’t think of a better way to bridge the gap between Germany and New Jersey. Allison was my client in Germany and now I get to work with her here. She has already become a huge source of comfort in a world of new. So thankful and so looking forward to watching little Brady grow up with his sweet family.
So happy to be back.
Until Soon,
SN
